We like our coffee, blacks

Ah, the benevolence of global capital.

Rwandans may not drink coffee, but is that any reason to stop them from growing it?

According to BusinessWeek, wealthy Westerners are committed "to [doubling] the income of poor coffee farmers" in Africa.

You remember Africa. The continent where rampant hunger almost never precipitates genocide, political instability, or high-seas banditry?

Just think of it: should the scheme prove profitable, desperate farmers can dedicate even more arable land to the cultivation of something that can't be slapped on a sandwich! After all, it's not like global coffee markets have ever dropped precipitously in the entire history of machete production!

This is the kind of do-goodery Bill and Melinda Gates really need to get in on. Fer certz.